Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
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Tornado booty call.. dedication
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
These tits shall not be calmed
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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