I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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