have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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