well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
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He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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