Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
The power of my boobs compel you
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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