We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize