It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize