shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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