Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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