I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
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we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
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