dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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