That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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