This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
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I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
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Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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