I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
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We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
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grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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