So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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