I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize