hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i just google imaged poop.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize