I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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