Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
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College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
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When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize