is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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