you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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