i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize