I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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