guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize