She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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