nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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