i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
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I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
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I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
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