Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come share oat with me in your robe
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize