chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
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