upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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