She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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