We won't sleep together?
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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