I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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