Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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