who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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