I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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