my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
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I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
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There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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