she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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