there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Randomize