I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
i think i have herpe
just one?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
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Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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