my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
There are leaves in my underwear?
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