If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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