I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
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