Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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