Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
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We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
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Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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