The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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