Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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