Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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