At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
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I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
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Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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