I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
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I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
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SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
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